Wednesday, August 12, 2015

This is my fight song, take back my life song...

A year ago this month I checked myself into the hospital because I could no longer handle...well, myself.

And a year ago today, I finally tried to put what I was feeling into words, and posted a blog entry about it.

A lot has changed since August 2014. I wish I could say that everything is great and I'm all better, but anyone who has struggled with depression and/or anxiety to this extent should know that's not really how it works. I actually didn't even really, truly reach rock bottom until after Dragon Con last year, and even since climbing out of that pit I've had plenty of days (and sometimes even weeks) when I felt myself sliding back into it.

I've made a lot of progress, thanks to a combination of therapy, medication, facing my own mistakes and issues and resolving to do my best to not make them again and not allow them to define me, removing toxic and/or abusive people from my life, and focusing on relationships with people who truly care about and are good for me (and to me). Sure, on the bad days, it's still hard to focus on how far I've come.

But I'm still here.

I'm still surviving.

Sometimes, I'm even living.

That's in no small part thanks to the amazing people who have put up with me throughout the past year. I love you all and could not ask for better friends.

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